they call her action!

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 06:56:36 GMT

2009 is not. my. year.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 17:05:44 GMT

when you figure out what you want to do with your life, everything else just seems to fall in to place.

who would have ever guessed in a million fucking years that i'd be a bio major? BIOLOGY. SERIOUSLY?? i used to be all MELLY'S GETTING A D IN BIOLOGY OMGOMGOMG. and now i'm majoring in it. but i'm realizing that the reason i always did so badly in bio was because i never gave a shit. now that i have something to work for i'm realizing that doing well isn't so hard.

i'm also currently nursing a very broken heart. but it's okay. i just play warcraft to take my mind off of it.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:02:43 GMT

copyright el guante.

ever the wiser

this is not a love song

i wake up every morning reluctantly
you said you were in love with me comfortably
but maybe you just fucked with me
now your love's corrupted me
i'm losin' my religion
provin' my premonition
by losin' to competition
our division, split like nuclear fission
and i ain't missin' the dissin' bitchin' trippin' rippin' on everything i'd given
but it's these vivid visions
makin' me livid 'bout our position
now i'm livin' without your kisses
how 'bout commitment?
i'm sick of this not knowing where you stand
show me that you can
show love when life ain't going how you planned
understand, that through all the shit you put me through
yeah i could be blue
but then it's true that girl you could be too
so what we got to lose? what you got to prove?
i need new shoes
'cause my SOUL's worn out...
they say we ain't supposed to shout
we ain't supposed to doubt
but what they know about?
i can't go without
even when i hate you, i love you
even when we make mistakes, we come to
eventually
so i guess it's time that's the remedy
you used to share a heavenly bed with me
i'm so sick of being enemies
potentially this could weigh heavily on my serenity
so i can't just let it be-- let's do this sensibly
and i ain't the type for ultimatums
but you weren't the type for broken promises-- ya still made 'em
but past is passed and at last i don't neglect that
we can't correct that
forget that-- let's just accept that
and get back, to how it used to be
i'm willing to forgive your using me
and pawning my mom's jewelry
and your abusing me and your cruelty
all the times that you fooled me by speaking bullshit so fluently
you almost ruined me
but we made it through the storm
albeit beaten mistreated ya cheated and left me forlorn

...but i'm willing to sacrifice
even though i can't deny ya appetite for mackin' not actin' right
let's push that back in the past tonight
let's just sit back, relax, and bask in the candlelight
i can't stand to fight-- i still remember
we got together back in september the day i met ya
two years and a month ago last week
we were makin' love two years and a month ago EXACTLY
and actually i guess the first time you caused sorrow
would be like two years and a month ago-- tomorrow
ever since then it's been like up and down
you come around askin' for love and now, ya fuck around
ya run around frantic, i can't stand it
ya took advantage of a hopeless romantic
ya planned it-- and i could never understand it
demanded and was granted how i put up with ya antics
aw dammit...

wait wait wait....hold up... YOU KNOW WHAT?

now that i think of it you're a bitch and i'm sick of it
you ripped my dignity pride my money and my innocence
respect i didn't get it not even a bit of it
though you sat on ya ass while i was workin' triple shifts
i'm an IDIOT
fuck all that shit-- you're pretty swift
you prolly drainin' my funds for some fun in the Carribean
but this was imminent i'm sick of givin' in
the shit i'm livin' in is like a prison and why couldn't you have just admitted it?
i guess i knew it all along
i guess i was just waiting for you to prove me wrong
but whatever now-- shit is over
i'm older and bolder and COLDER
so consider this CLOSURE
i'll grip my pride
ya shit's outside
this is goodbye
'cause bitch ya lied
my, word is bond
i hold my grudges absurdly long
so get gone early on

officially, this is an epiphany
ya wanted to get with me but only caused misery so you're history
so...
get the hell out my vicinity
quickly

copyright el guante.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 17:49:56 GMT

if my heart's soaking wet, boy your boots can leave a mess.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 05:36:46 GMT

lord, keep him safe.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 21:52:04 GMT

I AM THE MOST SELF-DESTRUCTIVE PERSON I KNOW.

IT'S COOL THOUGH, I'M PRETTY HAPPY LATELY.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 07:51:30 GMT

i drove home from carolinda's tonight completely content, thinking about how for the first time in forever i am happy with my life.

yeah. don't ever think that kind of shit. you'll just jinx yourself.

if things go back to the way they were before, i'll be crushed.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 03:38:24 GMT

as much as i'd like to believe that i am capable of controlling my emotions and my actions, i have a horrible feeling that i am going to end up unintentionally ruining things.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 12:57:02 GMT

i need you so much closer.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 08:47:18 GMT

did you know that if you hook your ipod up to your computer, it'll tell you how many times you've listened to each song?

i didn't. until today. so i'm quite excited by my new discovery. i'm scrolling down my list of songs, thinking "oh wow i've listened to beating hearts baby 263 times? that's crazy" and "i can't believe i've listened to master of puppets 134 times!!"

so finally i decide to just press the play count tab and have all my songs listed in order of how many times i've listened to them. i go to the top to see what my number one is.

i have listened to beast and the harlot by avenged sevenfold 1637 times.

okay. so it'd be one thing if i'd had the song on my ipod for years. but i downloaded it in january. meaning that in 8 months i've listened to it 1637 times. that's fucking ridiculous.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 00:14:41 GMT

i miss melly awesome. i don't even know who she is anymore.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 18:17:05 GMT

i need to move somewhere far away where i dont know anyone. where i can start over completely, build a new life and completely forget everything about my past.

either that or i need to just end it all.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 02:09:44 GMT

rip, my wonderful mazda protege. you were a good friend to me for the last 6 years and i will truly miss you.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 20:12:39 GMT

obama for president.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 22:14:43 GMT

i am still living with your ghost
lonely and dreaming of the west coast
i dont want to be your downtime
i dont want to be your stupid game

with my big black boots and an old suitcase
i do believe i'll find myself a new place
i dont want to be the bad guy
i dont want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
i just want to see some palm trees
go and try and shake away this disease

we can live beside the ocean
leave the fire behind
swim out past the breakers
watch the world die

i am still dreaming of your face
hungry and hollow for all the things you took away

i dont want to be your good time
i dont want to be your fall-back crutch anymore

i'll walk right out into a brand new day
insane and rising in my own weird way
i dont want to be the bad guy

i dont want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
i just want to feel some sunshine
i just want to find some place to be alone

we can live beside the ocean
leave the fire behind
swim out past the breakers
watch the world die.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Mon, 10 Dec 2007 04:00:25 GMT

get your fucking life together, melissa.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Sat, 08 Sep 2007 14:19:30 GMT

learning how to be alone.

and devastated.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 03:33:37 GMT

lupus fucking rocks. as does being hospitalized overnight on a far too frequent basis.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Fri, 27 Oct 2006 06:04:45 GMT

igot arresteddddddddddddd. suck it. love, melissa.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Sat, 13 May 2006 06:59:11 GMT

i'm SO drunk right now. but f aything i just wnat to reember thi night as the nght that i spilled beer on dj at the bar.

i'm stilll in love wth ryan but i try so hard to cover it up

but anyway i poured beer on dj on purpose and imso drunk that i barely remmeber it. but i did take beer and pour it on him HAAAHAHAH thats what he gets for having small penis

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Fri, 20 Jan 2006 17:32:39 GMT

THIS TRIP IS A SHITSHOW. we all get ridiculously wasted every night and go crazy. the other night i got so drunk that i slept on garrett and drew's bathroom floor.

im having the time of my liiiife. we are all so incredibly close this point, it's like one big family.

i dont want it to enddd! i want us to stay here for the rest of the year.... and it all ends so soon. we#re in berlin now and its our last stop. i love everzone so much i cant stand the thought of not being with everyone all the time.

BERLIN. the y and z kezs are reveresed and its confusing.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Sat, 07 Jan 2006 16:19:36 GMT

oh ps i'm in amsterdam.

it is time.

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Wed, 22 Dec 2004 04:17:11 GMT

the day has finally come. after over 3 years of being public, livejournal dot com slash users slash hackneyed, THEY CALL HER ACTION, is becoming...

yes. i am going friends only.
if you aren't already on my friends list, comment to be added!
(there is always the chance that this will be just a phase and i will go back to being public. but for now, it's how i roll.)

love,
melissa

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Tue, 21 Dec 2004 08:17:54 GMT

today we went to sacre-coeur and some guys surrounded me and tried to put some string thing on my finger? i don't really know what was going on, but they surrounded me and i had to force my way through them. then one said "fuck you" and i yelled "sallop!" which was exciting because i had really wanted to yell that at a stranger. then one called me a "sallop de mierd."

shesatragedy@hotmail.com — Sat, 18 Dec 2004 21:50:04 GMT

i'm here in paris and it's amazing. fucking beautiful.
except this morning i threw up all over the side of the road. i don't know what's wrong with me. but it sucks and i feel like crap.
tomorrow= the lourve and notre dame. hot.